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Drive In(2000)

Rating out of 5 possible lobsters :

 

 

"Park and hide"

Drive In is so bad it hurts. Any movie that can make 81 minutes feel like the 12 days of Christmas has to be pretty bad. Written and directed by a guy named Chuck DeBus. His name has been placed on the DO NOT RENT ANYTHING FROM THIS GUY AGAIN list in my head! I'd love to see the original script writing.  It was probably written on used toilet paper and was about 7 leafs long. Wherever there was a shit stain, that was the lead's killer parts...

Some fucking retard named Billy is locked up in a basement bedroom by his mother who does so to hide him from the rest of the voting world as she tries to win a community/goverment position. The main point of her campaign is to rid the world of violent/horror movies as she feels it inhibits violent behavior in young people. Meanwhile, as her son Billy is locked in his bedroom he has a clear view of the drive in theatre screen through his window(must be nice!). This particular theatre only plays horrifically violent horror  flicks and they give Billy an idea or two if you know what I mean.  One quiet evening at home while Max, Billy's brother, who is gayer than a male hairdresser, leaves Billy's  door unlocked and he escapes to terrorize the Drive In theatre next door.

Basically the whole movie is Billy going from car to car and to the canteen to kill unsuspecting teens.  How anyone could get killed in the middle of a drive in and have no one else notice is beyond me.  I haven't seen so many plot holes since Super Ben Affleck in Pearl Harbour and his Super Man's like  powers.

My favorite part has to be when Billy kills a chick in a bathroom and no one notices. She is screaming her lungs out and no one hears. Yet later on in the movie when another girl finds her body, everyone outside the friggin building can hear her and come to help. Chuck DeBus... YOU SUCK! Learn how to  make a movie that makes an ounce of sense will ya!

The only light of hope here is a titty scene in the back of a van! Nice rack! Besides that there isn't much here to see. The movies showing on the drive in screen looked pretty cool. I would have rather watched what they were watching and not Billy's pathetic killing spree. If you watch closely you will notice that the movie on the drive in screen co-insides with Billy's  killing spree. I guess it's suppose to be a message that horror movies do cause violent behavior.  Yeah whatever!

Henry's Comments

 "I felt violent watching Drive In but it wasn't because of the violence.  It was because it sucked shit!"