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Route 666(2001)

Rating out of 5 possible lobsters :



The very first movie on HMTS to ever receive a zero lobster rating!

Lou Diamond Phillips has to be the biggest fallen star in the history of Hollywood!  The guy went from 'The First Power', 'Young Guns' to making movies like 'Bats' and  now the ever so lame 'Route 666'! After watching Route 666 all I can do is shake my head in utter disbelief. Did what I watch really happen? How could a movie so awful be made and how  could a so called star like Phillips ever agree to make such a piece of shit? Maybe it was  because I just saw Vanilla Sky the night before and I'm still in a trance from that... or maybe Route 666 did absolutley suck shit! I truly believe the ladder of the two possibilities is the correct one.

Ever see a movie about an old highway(Route 666) that no one has travelled in 30 years because everytime someone attempts to travel it they are killed by a group of State Prison Construction Working zombies? Yes you heard me correctly, zombies carrying construction equipment who kill anyone  who steps on their precious asphalt! Believe it or not that is the plot to Route 666! It gets better...  Let's back up a bit first...

Phillips plays an FBI Special Agent who is trying to get a witness back to court so he can testify in LA. In order to get his witness back, him and his Special Agent Posse must travel Route 66 in order to make it back in time. The witness, named Rabbit, attemps to pull off a Chris Tucker sort of character  and boy does it fail! Look out Rush Hour fans! Instead of Tucker and Chang we know have Phillips and Rabbit! How lame can you get by throwing in an African American character who does nothing but makes bad jokes in the worst situations. It's been done way too many times and certainly doesn't work  with a B movie like Route 666! Back to the story... Route 66 quickly turns into a dead end and leads to Route 666 which no sane man will travel. So inorder to make their court date and make a shitty movie while they're at it, they take 666 and the asphalt begins to turn red! Just when you think the movie can't get any worse it does just that! An unlawful redneck Sheriff and Deputy are now thrown into the mix and they are out to kill Phillips and his crew for absolutley no reason. I guess they didn't see much action down in their neck of the woods. Meanwhile,  Phillips and Co are also trying to fight off the group of Construction zombies who keep appearing  everytime one of them steps on pavement. It turns out that the crooked Sheriff killed a bunch of young men on the highway 30 years back and paved over their bodies on Route 66.  And that's where our beloved Construction Zombies came from. Laughing yet?

Oh and one more little detail. One of the zombies is Phillips father and just as he is about to kill his son he realizes who he is and turns on the other zombies and ends up saving everybody. Wow  what a great movie!

Henry's Comments

 "All I can vision is Lou holding up a sign somewhere saying 'Will suck cock for movie role'!"